Yeah, so much for the plan of "going slow"... It never works that way, does it?
I spent the night at Eric's last night and one thing lead to another... sigh. It was good.
He let me take a bath in his huge tub and read me some e.e. cummings and listened to me tell stories for hours. I'm pretty comfortable around him, but this is all very new and kind of scary for me. I tend to become a bit codependant when I really like somone, and I don't want to be that way...
I asked him if he was still going to introduce me as his "friend", and he said that he was going to introduce me as his "girl" now. It's rather non-commital if you ask me, but I'm rather insecure right now. However, I don't want to press things right now, mostly because I am terrified. Of course, I'm doing my best to not appear terrified...
Guess who called as I was driving back to my apartment this morning? That's right-- Ryan, the bookstore man. He was calling to find out when we were supposed to be going to the play. I said that since I hadn't heard from him in two weeks, I had invited someone else. He said, "I didn't realize that I had to call in order to maintain my invitation." (Which really pissed me off, of course.)
I explained that he hadn't called in two weeks, that he hadn't returned my phonecall, and so I made other plans. I said I was sorry. He said he was sorry that he hadn't called, and then he asked me when the play was and how much tickets were, because he's considering going anyway with some of his other friends. This boy is really rubbing me the wrong way. I think he is either really inconsiderate or he just DOESN'T GET IT.
Anyway, I felt that I handled the situation rather well and that I behaved politely. I wanted to bitch to someone about it, but Mary and I still aren't talking and I couldn't get ahold of either of my parents (I treat them more like close friends than parental units). I talked about the situation with my roomate, and she said it was fine that I invited someone else, and that Ryan was rude by not calling me earlier.
I don't know why I do that, seek affirmation about my actions from other people. I think it's because I feel gulity whenever I think I may have hurt someone's feelings, even if it's an accident or the result of a misunderstanding. I really care a lot about other people, and I analyze my actions toward them entirely too much for my own good.
Today is going to be spent studying for the archeology exam I have tomorrow, as I don't know the majority of what is on the review sheet. Pray for my memorization capabilities...
2:30 p.m. - Wednesday, Feb. 11, 2004
Recent entries:
Birdwatcher - Sunday, Mar. 29, 2009
- - Sunday, Mar. 11, 2007
Keep Your Pants On - Sunday, Dec. 17, 2006
It's Easier This Way - Monday, Oct. 30, 2006
I Could Have Left You Forever - Monday, Oct. 30, 2006
My profile
Archives
Notes
Diaryland
Random
RSS
others:
clutter
grim
chaya
servo
a-priori
bluechicken
darrylzer0
mochapixie
sweetker
boyshaped
boogie
akorithi
hardluck
sepiatones
incognizant
shoeboxdiary
re-rendered
kilgoretrout
genghis-jon
operastar
maxg
opusshrugged