The earache is subsiding now, and it doesn't feel as if there is a lake in my inner ear. All hail antibiotics! Actually, I hate antibiotics, but felt they were needed in this case. Anyone who has had an ear infection would probably agree with me.
While I've had the time off, I've done a little home improvement. Monday I went to Wal-Mart and bought storage supplies, such as a bookshelf, closet cabinet, and a chrome bathroom shelving unit. Then I put all of them together, BY MYSELF, using screwdrivers and a hammer. It really gave me a sense of accomplishment. Also, I've been able to save a decent amount of money this month (thanks to some six month old checks from my old tutoring position), so it looks like I may be able to move into the one bedroom apartment I've been dreaming of for over a year. I have to post flyers and such, and hopefully I will have a subletter and will be signing a new lease by March 1st.
The other night at Shawn's gig, I met this wonderful woman named Susan. She's friends with Shawn and Mary. We exchanged phone numbers, and she invited Mary and I out to St. Pete for another Beauvilles gig. While in St. Pete, she listened to me babble about my crush and gave me a bit of advice about Ryan. I think that was really sweet of her, because I must have been annoying as hell. Anyway, she called me again last night and we talked for about an hour. She told me about this cool little art gallery that I need to get on the mailing list for, and I found out that she has this really interesting job designing pools. I really feel like she and I are on the same wavelength. Now I just have to work on my problem of interrupting her (she didn't say anything to me, but I know I cut her off at least three times-- oops!). Anyway, I think she's going to be a fun friend to have.
So, it has been a WEEK since my date with Ryan, and he has not called. I called him Sunday and left a message, and he has not returned my call. It's fine if he doesn't want to date me, but the man can at least call. I didn't know that kissing him on the cheek was the "kiss of death" for any chance of a friendship with him, but perhaps it was. Do most 29 year-old men act this rude and immature? I sure know how to pick 'em... Ah well, such is life. I'm wondering how he's going to handle the date we have planned to see The Temptest. It will be interesting to see if he tries to weasel out of those plans... he doesn't seem the type. If he does, I'll just take someone else (like Mary). Maybe I'll invite Susan and her man...
Valentines Day is creeping up on me, and it wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't keep thinking about how I was with James the past two Valentines and how sweet and wonderful he was to me. Also, he's been sending me really sappy "I love you, and I wish things could have been different" e-mails lately. It's not that I don't like these e-mails, it's that they make me cry. I feel really horrible that I couldn't just stick with James. He really loved me and treated me well. However, I know that he's not someone that I would have married.
He doesn't have the drive and motivation to really do much of anything, and I don't think I can spend my whole life trying to push someone along... However, I think that he is a wonderful person, and part of me will always love him. I can't stand his new girlfriend, but I suppose she is doing her part to help him out... and she really loves him (so he tells me). I know that he's not really happy though, and it makes me sad to know that when he looks back on things that the days we spent in his old apartment together are the days that he was the happiest. It makes me sad because I want him to be his happiest NOW. I don't want him to forever be looking back to something we had to make him happy...
10:46 a.m. - Wednesday, Feb. 04, 2004
Recent entries:
Birdwatcher - Sunday, Mar. 29, 2009
- - Sunday, Mar. 11, 2007
Keep Your Pants On - Sunday, Dec. 17, 2006
It's Easier This Way - Monday, Oct. 30, 2006
I Could Have Left You Forever - Monday, Oct. 30, 2006
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